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| Over the years my mother's mental state has always been in question by me. That is perhaps why at the age of which I could start to reason and began to figure this out I picked up an interest in psychology. Over time I have tried to diagnose her the best I could, and with some examples I narrowed it down to bi-polar or borderline personality disorder. As time and my studies have progressed instead of being able to narrow it down a recently revelation due to the studies of how the minds of paranoid schizophrenics work has thrown a third possible answer into the mix. She has become increasingly more paranoid about many things, most of which involving my father and his supposed actions getting her into trouble with the law. It seems as though if every time any event that has ever once occurred in any chain of events unfolds, be it events A, B, C, Z, etc., that she believes that within that same moment in time in which the new event occurs that every event that has ever transpired in connection to that event within her realm of experience or imagination also swings into action coming through fruition at the same moment that the new event ends. Such experiences are becoming more common to see with her, and even when she is told how such occurrences are impossible her belief that every event within said chain is not shaken but grows stronger. In fact it makes her paranoid and mentally violent towards the person who explains this to her.
I no longer know how to handle the situation. I feel it is completely out of my control and that she needs emergency psychiatric help forced upon her in order for the rest of us to live a normal, peaceful existence. If these delusions continue I fear that there is no end for what will befall my family at the hands of her paranoia,
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| Long time no update. I've been rather busy as of late between my amazing girlfriend, my crazy family, my band, and an internet connection that's slower than the original dial up. Yes, High Speed Hughesnet with speeds up 24x Slower than 28.6kbps connection, buy it today and never complete another download in your life. *Insert cheesy Rock Lee smile here*
Now to get down to some serious business. All in all I miss the living hell out of my amazing girlfriend, Cindy. I'm having to spend a month out of state with the band to prepare for a concert. It's hell, no lie I'm still jet lagged and don't have enough money for enough nicotine to keep me happy. I just hope we get work while we're down here as was promised because I need cash. I want to take my girl someplace nice when I return to her. She very much so deserves it, I mean after all she's willing to spend any amount of time and money to make sure I'm happy. So why shouldn't I do the same for her if I truly want her to be happy? Exactly, there is no reason as long as I keep everything responsible and take care of my personal debts and wot, wot. But, yeah my first goal for her is a promise ring. Just cause it's all cute and cuddly like =D before I get her that though we will most likely be going to a 3 day SCA event that I want to pay for myself. It's kind of a couples retreat and I will need it by the end of this month because well I really want to spend some quality time with this girl. I don't mean the perverted kind of quality kind either, more or less just the cute and cuddly puppy lovey kind of quality time. What can I say I like to be sickeningly cute, and she does too which makes everything perfect. I'm just glad we don't fight. We still disagree on things and such but we manage to solve our issues without fighting just kind of more or less talk it out and see who's idea looks the best on paper and is most assuredly attainable. That goes a long ways into why I love her so much. Not only is she almost exactly like me in almost all traits and characteristics including food, hygiene, hobbies, entertainment, clothes, sleep schedules, and more, seriously my friends call her female John due to it, but she's one of the most giving and sensible people I know. It's amazing.
As far as the band goes. Honestly, I'm not much of a musician and I'm not too incredibly passionate about it. I mean look I've been playing less than a year and people are trying to make me learn entire songs in under 30 minute. It doesn't work like that, I don't think like that, and that just pisses me off. How am I supposed to work or even function like that? I mean you give me enough time to get an intro up to speed and tell me that with that information that I have to be able to play an entire song? Fuck, all you're going to get out of me is the intro and at any point in the song where sections of that repeat, well you'll get that too, sometimes. Personally I just don't think I'm cut out for this shit. I mean it's too much pressure with having to be away from what makes me happy, and overall happiness has a lot to do with it for me. If I'm happy I function great, for the most part. If I'm miserable well then I don't function at all. I'm somewhere in the middle at the moment. Seriously though I just want to get back and settle down with my love and spend the rest of the summer saving up money together and being all cute all the time.
:( I miss her
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| Alright now as a writer I am always looking for an opportunity to get myself published. Like some of you I have taken the route of looking at large and small time publishers and found my chances to be best with smaller companies that focus on getting new writers names out there. These companies usually tend to Ezine based, have either online, annual magazine or both forms of distribution, provide small or no amounts of compensation for your work,k and are generally non-profit. There are many of these out there but in particular my favorites are the Silverthorn Press and the Forever Nocturne ezines. Both of these are focused on short stories and pieces of art particularly in the Macabre areas, though Forever Nocturne also publishes poetry. From what I can tell Silverthorn Press releases only through their newsletter with some limited information on their website, while Forever Nocturne releases in both paper and digital media, the paper edition will cost you though. Neither company provides compensation for your work and Forever Nocturne takes this little First Print licensing agreement so that you can not publish your story anywhere else for a short period of time. Personally I see this as a good thing for the author as not to allow for the over saturation and exposure of their work, but you may have a differing opinion as a writer; to each his own.
With all of this being said I am looking to create my own Ezine that covers types of literature not covered in the upper section of this blog. My goal is to create something similar to the Weekly Jumps in Japan or the Shonen Jump here in the U.S. but have it contain full chapters of various stories, some short stories, comics, etc. all done by serious unpublished writers who are looking for their first crack at the publishing world. The only restricted content will be that of a sexual nature and only to the extent that I do not want works that are merely porn in text format, incest should be kept restricted, as should anything else restricted by society sexually, granted you may have it in your work but I ask that you keep tasteful. My requirements as of now for when I gather everything and get it started will be as follows for a submission.
1. Self edit or pay someone else to. Your articles will appear as is because I certainly do not have the time to edit everyone's articles.
2. I will need a complete and I emphasize complete storyline for the story, unless it is a one shot short story. This is to ensure that you are serious about writing and have fully thought everything out.
3. I would like a full character list of important characters both protagonist and antagonist. I know these are subject to change, but this too is to help show your determination.
4. You must submit at least Four chapters in your submission. This allows two things. 1. I get to see how your writing style pans out. 2. It gives you a four plus submission cushion to fall back on if you miss a deadline.
5. A written statement agreeing that you are legally obligated to finish any of your writings that I publish and you consent to being published. This can be a hasty ending or whatever it's your neck as a writer that's on the line, but this is for your own good as a writer.
6. Any character sketches, comic drawings in full color please. These will generally be published along side your story as a kind of lead in before the first few chapters. I think that it is important to allow the authors to communicate with the reader and explain how they got where they are show character sheets and such off as often as possible. I want you to connect with your readers, full credit should be given to the authors.
7. Finally, I will need your real legal name for copyright purposes as well as the pen name you wish your work to be published under if so desired.
That is all I have thought of so far. Everything else will be taken care of by me. If you are someone who wishes to help advertise, donate to help promote the Ezine once it is launched, or help me design a web page for the Ezine please contact me either here or via my personal email fireraven@rocketmail.com
Thank you all and have a great day.
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| Disclaimer: Solstice, Fauztin, Alexander and Talia are not my original characters but are results of derivative works written by "Solstice" and "Snitcakes". The above mentioned characters are used with permission from their creators and their works are part of the official story.
Notes: This is an initial list of main characters most of whom have their own story to be told. There are still several villains who need to be added to the villains but can wait due to when they come into the story.
Heroes
Name: Bajif Ishtar, sometimes referred to as the Immortal of Flame
Age: Pre-History
Race: Immortal-Human
History: Has done many things in the name of humanity. Most notably he raised an army in order to ward off the Minotaur King's rise to the over land from the caves of Hades, and killing Hades himself, creating Vampires and Lycans in the process. He is also noted for relentlessly continuing the age old war between Immortals due to his father's death at the hands of the Immortal Rita Gawr (Note: the Celtic Gods Rita Gawr and Dagda were named after these two immortals.) Evidence of this can be seen in the Great War, the Minotaur war, The First and Second World Wars, and various other little wars throughout Europe during the middle ages. Fought alongside Fireraven in the Minotaur war while he was a druid. Soon after he began hunting the newly created Vampires because they were hunting people, and some were killing people. He had several serious skirmishes with Fireraven, all ending surprisingly in draws, before they eventually became allies.
Powers: Has limited control of fire, has trained himself to be at inhuman speeds, is ridiculously hard to kill, and has trained his senses to the point that he can tell what is going on in a room with his eyes closed.
Appearance: General appearance carries a Diamond Flame styled sword that was enchanted by Merlin (obtained just before the Minotaur war, year is undetermined *to be honest I forgot*) He has bright brown hair with reddish yellow eyes, an average body build but completely chiseled from head to toe.
Personality: Very stern and serious. Forward thinking does not like to waste time by Immortal standards, which means he may think over an idea for a month or two before acting upon it unless someone else is acting faster. He cares deeply for the human race, but even more so about killing Rita Gawr which is his prime motivation in life. He has been known to manipulate people to fight for him including gods and Fireraven himself, so it should be noted that he is very charismatic.
Name: Fireraven Hollowheart (Birthname discarded many years before turning)
Age: Several hundred years old.
Race: Vampire
History: At one point was a druid in training in a clan in what is now Britain. Was turned after the calamity that occurred upon Hades' death. As a result he was exiled along with many other members of his clan. Eventually helped to found the Cabal of the Civilized Five. Fought in a war known only as The Great War, along side Solstice, Alexander and many others. After helping cure the black plague vanished for a time appearing only now and again for random purposes. His motives at this point are unclear.
Powers: Has the ability to turn into a Firefly or a burning raven. Is almost completely immune to fire. If destroyed and turned to ashes, can reform if a majority of his ashes are nearby. Has the ability to create custom spells by working through the gods. Is immune to sunlight due to a contract with Aries.
Appearance: Long, straight, flowing black hair, eyes of a deep ocean blue, dark eyelashes and a natural eyeliner effect around his eyes. His clothing tends to be random but he has an affinity for trench coats and will wear one whenever the opportunity arises. Most normally seen in Gothic attire or clothing that fits into the area he is in. Has been known to randomly pierce areas of his body without warning or provocation.
Personality: If you don't know by now read my story. I can not explain it in such a small area.
Name: Solstice
Age: Has been aged to around 40 from a curse bestowed upon her by the Goddess Morgana
Race: Stardust Cabal
Special Abilities: Cloud Minds and the Cloud Minds Mist.
Personality: Mean and a Lone Rogue. Her never wanting to be attached to any man has made her alone
Friends: Fireraven is someone she seeks out to be able to get a good nights rest he provides her sanctuary. Fauztin is someone she has grown a very deep respect for and cares about him as a friend. Alexander is the only man she will let get anywhere close to her on a personal level. She truly loves him but cannot bring herself to have a conventional relationship.
NAME: Fauztin Shepard Wolfbane
AGE: 22
ALIGNMENT: Morally good to others if it's not out of his way; A drifter
SPECIES: Vampire/Lycan Hybrid (Explained in history)
BIRTHDAY: May 28th, 1325
GENDER: Male
APPEARANCE: 6'6”, slender, tight-fitting white leather armor, hooded, muscular, clean-shaven
PERSONALITY: A bloodthirsty killer sworn to revenge, though compassionate for his companions and always willing to go out of his way to aid those in need. He won't start a fight, but when push comes to shove, he'll slide a knife through your throat.
BRIEF BIO: Born from a Vampire father and a Lycan mother, his family was killed for treason to their own races. Orphaned, he swore revenge against the Lycans for the massacre he witnessed. He trained to be a killer and dedicated his life to hunting and destroying any of the beasts he was ever to come across. With his mixed genes, he has been turned by a Lycan, and his Vampire companion Alexander, in an attempt to save him from a fate worse than death, turned him to a Vampire before the venom had a chance to finish its effect. This resulted in the first of his kind, a hybrid race between the two immortal enemies of the night. He then stayed by Fireraven of The Civilized Five's side to find a cure to the Black Plague, and took part in Great War of super-natural beings with his beloved Talia, a civilized Lycan who led an army of human-loving Lycans dedicated to preserving humanity at her command.
PERSONALITY: Loving and kind. He falls for the hard resenting type easily, as he so often wants to make others feel better and happier. In striving to make those who bottle things up and become vicious as they are, he falls for a Vampire of Old by the name of Solstice, the Vampire ancestor of another famous Vampire, whom which she was named after. His undying love for her describes his personality perfectly, and would do anything within his physical capability to protect her from harm.
BRIEF BIO: Alexander was born a man from one of the major cities of Europe. He was enlisted as a soldier and turned into a Vampire while battling an opposing nation. He was enlisted in a clan of Vampires that ravaged the survivors of battles for their blood, but he was disgusted by them and deserted them. He sought to preserve human life, and he only fed on animal blood, except when necessary to travel during the day. Human blood is a shield against the sun to those who can train themselves to stay away from blood long enough. It’s a power that’s developed, not an automatic thing. He met with another Vampire named Solstice, a loner, but he accompanied her for a short while, and in that short while, became involved with her, but only to be left with a broken heart. Alexander hunts the Lycans currently and has for years in search of the Vampire clan that warred with the beasts just to find a purpose for his undeath and Vampiric being. Through his broken heart, he wished to inflict pain and death, but not wanting to hurt anyone that did not deserve it, he chose to hunt the Lycans, the filthy beasts that hunted humans for no purpose other than food. He came across an ancient Vampire named Fireraven during his travels, who was also acquainted with Solstice, who only tolerated him because of his power and considered him somewhat of an ally, as he was not a foe. Alexander traveled with Fireraven for near a decade, learning from him, and after time went by, he chose to travel on his own, bidding Fireraven farewell, and hunted the Lycans by himself. Many years later, he heard the rumors of Fauztin, a mortal Lycan hunter.
NAME: Talia Isabella Faintings
AGE: 19
ALIGNMENT: Compassionately good, seeks to help others
SPECIES: Lycan
BIRTHDAY: March 21th, 1328
GENDER: Female
APPEARANCE:
Lycan Form: Sleek glossy white coat of fur, diamond glinting teeth, 6'10 upright, and claws with six inch long nails
Human Form: Dark black hair, pale skin, 5'6, slender, dark black clothing, and seemingly timid.
PERSONALITY: Her mating with Fauztin caused the power to control the shape-shifting desire. Non descendants could not obtain this power. She and Fauztin married and mated, and in her first pregnancy, she was granted the gift of immortality with the mixture of his blood (immortality to the affect of "until killed"). This also granted her immunity to the Black Plague. They cared for each other dearly, though were separated during their efforts in the Black Plague in the Lycan Revolt War. The Lycans attacked the Vampires trying to help the humans survive and many were killed. Talia was the last survivor amongst a battle, and she was gravely wounded. She and Fauztin were separated for a long time, but reunited after she recuperated and had created a small clan of her own to assist her. From there, her clan grew to be an army after Fauztin dedicated himself to Fireraven's side in aiding humanity. Talia dedicated her army to protect the protectors.
BRIEF BIO: She was the first of her kind to create a humanity preserving clan of Lycans. She cares deeply for human life, and never feeds upon their flesh. She led a mighty clan of four branches of dens, with a count of fifty Lycans per outpost. She raised an empire of Lycans, and she was the first real organized army of Lycans to have ever walked the Earth. Most of her followers were refugees taken in or Lycans that were spared from fights that were released from their chains of past clan leader forcing them to fight humans under the command of the Lycan clan leader. Only her direct descendants had the power to shape-shift whenever they desired, the others could only be human during day and Lycan at night. She led an army of Lycans against the Stardust Cabal during the Immortal Wars. The Lycan army was crushed, and only a fifth of the clan survived, only to become the bloodslaves. A few of her direct descendants escaped the onslaught, but never raised the clan to be what it once was. Without their leader, they were forced on the run for ages.
Name: Jack
Sex: Male
Race: Vampire
Appearance: Wears a preachers outfit, average height.
Powers: Has the power to talk people into a blissful trance where they feel as if they are in paradise.
History: Was once a preacher but was forced to become a Vampire by Reaver. Is saved after escaping by Fireraven.
Personality: Meek and timid though fearsome when his friends are in trouble. Though somewhat careless...
Name: Jane
Sex: Female
Race: Vampire
Appearance: Petite and blue eyed
Powers: unknown and undeveloped
History: Molested and raped by her immediate family her entire life, saved by Fireraven.
Personality: Cheerful, wild and carefree though deeply mentally disturbed.
Name: Mordred
Sex: Male
Race: Human
Appearance: Wears light armor and white garbs with gold trim during his first life.
Powers: Uses magic taught to him.
History: King Arthur's son destined to bring peace to the world. His father jealous that it was not him who was the chosen one kills him.
Personality: Avenger.
Name: Aries
Sex: Male
Race: God
Appearance: Wears plate armor and rides on a horse most of the time 6ft tall
Powers: Powers of destruction
History: Cyclopian king killed by Hades and reincarnated without his memories.
Personality: Believes strongly in justice and fairness. Goes out of his way to help others and ensure a fair trial, but is ruthless when it comes to killing his enemies.
Name: Merlin
Sex: Male
Race: Human
Appearance: 5ft 5 inches carries a staff and wears assorted hooded cloaks
Powers: Powers of nature and magic
History: Guiding figure for magic of all time. Is banished to Purgatory after failing to see world peace through to fruition. Is brought back when Mordred is reincarnated.
Personality: Stern strict old man lives very reclusively
Name: Imdel
Sex: Male
Race: Human
Appearance: Roman Legion uniform
Powers: Super speed from training and swordsmanship
History: Grew up worshiping Aries. Joins the Roman infantry around the time Bajif does.
Personality: Serious and devoted towards what needs to be done. The perfect soldier.
Name: Hazredal
Sex: Male
Race: Human/Liche
Appearance: Wears dark robes
Powers: Necromancy
History: Has a fallout with Allah and is banished to eternity as a Liche on his own planet though gained followers in the process becoming a form of Demi-god known as a Liche. All non-religious souls are sent to his planet for him to guard.
Personality: Strongly desires his own freedom as well as the freedom of those banished with him. Believes in love and the freedom of the heart. Defies the second crusade with the help of the the Roman and Celtic Gods.
Villains
Name: Hades
Sex: Male
Race: God
Appearance: Look the the Dark Ruler Ha Des Yugioh card... That's my idea >.< Carries a scimitar
Powers: Power to control the dead, resurrect and command them in a fight. Has some control over creating things just like all Gods do. Controls the afterlife of the followers of the Greek/Roman pantheon.
History: Constantly fights with Aries and Bajif. Ends up dying in the Minotaur war and is accidentally revived by Solstice in the Twenty-first century
Personality: Does whatever is best for him, irregardless of what anyone else wants from him.
Name: Allah
Sex: Male
Race: God
Appearance: Dresses in standard Muslim attire. Dark skinned, brown eyes, 5ft 7inches uses godly powers to fight so no weapon unless he conjures it
Powers: All the powers of a God. Can create, manipulate his follower's minds, destroy entire cities, etc.
History: Read the Bible and Quaran. One of the Israeli Pantheon triplets, brother to Jehovah and Yahweh.
Personality: As of yet undeveloped. Used to get along with his brothers well though but inevitably Jehovah causes a power struggle between the three causing a permanent split.
Name: Yahweh
Sex: Male
Race: God
Appearance: Dresses in standard Jewish attire. Light skinned, green eyes, with a cruly Jew-fro, 5ft 9inches uses godly powers to fight so no weapon unless he conjures it
Powers: All the powers of a God. Can create, manipulate his follower's minds, destroy entire cities, etc.
History: Read the Bible and Quaran. One of the Israeli Pantheon triplets, brother to Jehovah and Allah.
Personality: As of yet undeveloped. Used to get along with his brothers well though but inevitably Jehovah causes a power struggle between the three causing a permanent split.
Name: Jehova
Sex: Male
Race: God
Appearance: Dresses like the Pope. Caucasian, blue eyes, long flowing blonde hair and absolutely beautiful. 5ft 11inches uses godly powers to fight so no weapon unless he conjures it
Powers: All the powers of a God. Can create, manipulate his follower's minds, destroy entire cities, etc.
History: Read the Bible and Quaran. One of the Israeli Pantheon triplets, brother to Allah and Yahweh.
Personality: As of yet undeveloped. Used to get along with his brothers well though but inevitably his ego causes a power struggle between the three causing a permanent split.
Stardust Cabal Membership
Name: Queen Solstice
Sex: Female
Race: Vampire
Appearance: Almost identical to Solstice, with a more upscale taste in clothes.
Powers: Same as Solstice. In addition she has incredible powers of seduction. Can transform into a beautiful doe.
History: Has quite an unusual history with certain main characters, but to reveal this would be too much. Let's just say she's an integral pivot for the storyline.
Personality: Cold, cruel, careless, but longs to be loved. Is truly mentally disturbed by the rejection of her lover upon her turning into a vampire and seeks companionship though runs away from it when she finds it.
Name: Reaver
Sex: Male
Race: Vampire
Appearance: Average, yet muscular build about six feet tall. Tends to wear a lot of bondage-like attire because he feels it represents a stereotypical image that should scare people and offend Christians. His clothing tends to be tight and show off his bulge.
Powers: His powers are stealth oriented and he makes for a great assassin. He can mask his aura, meld through solid objects as well as turn into a bat and fly away. His other powers are as of yet unknown but he is believed to have more.
History: Once Jack the Ripper is now the newest member of the Stardust Cabal. His official origin is unknown.
Personality: Vindictive, angry, manipulative and loves to watch things die in creative manner. His favorite past time is destroying Christian churches and forcing people to watch as he rapes and mutilates the rest of them. He believes himself above all Gods and Goddesses and plans to eventually overthrow Queen Solstice and make himself King of the Stardust Cabal.
Name: Sheograd
Sex: Male.
Race: Vampire
Appearance: The thinnest member of the Stardust Cabal. Dresses mostly in garbs befitting a man who has spent many years homeless and wandering the city streets without money or help. His eyes are a stark yet vibrant shade of red, most of the time.
History: A member of the Stardust Cabal. No one knows much about him. It is said he may have had a family at one point.
Powers: As of yet undecided.
Personality: Completely and fully insane. He loves to taunt, tease and joke in a menacing and very aggressive manner. His joking will often lead to a torturous death. Sheograd is generally the one to start fights withing the Stardust Cabal. He has an obsession with many different soft drinks and despite being completely insane and bloodthirsty has a soft side for kittens and often keeps a group of cats around him a majority of the time, when not doing cabal work that is.
Name: Lacertos
Sex: Male
Race: Vampire
Appearance: Tall, muscular with a build similar to Lt. Armstrong (Fullmetal Alchemist) or Arnold Schwarzenegger. His eyes appear soulless. Short, dark cropped hair.
Powers: Mostly brute force and speed enhancing. Has the ability to quickly absorb an amount of blood in his body like a steroid enhancing his speed and strength. This leaves him weakened and less able to regenerate afterwords.
History: A member of the Stardust Cabal. Not much else is known of his history at the current moment.
Personality: Very cool, calm and collective. He is the kind of person that is very easy to get along with, but would not hesitate to kill you if you got in his way. Because of this he is often seen as the voice of reason within the cabal and is often the only one who can hold the others back from killing one another during cabal war meetings. Normally very quiet and not opinionated he makes the perfect loyal bodyguard dedicated to whatever task is set before him. Despite all of this he has his own sick and twisted version of morality resulting in his own very unique code of conduct and ethics.
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| Alright well I'm planning on continuing my story but I'm unsure how at the moment. I will probably finish off the journal and what not because the story from the journal is integral in the grand scheme of my new over all project. I've been doing research into long continuing epic tales and what not trying to figure out the best way in which to continue, advertise and such and that has been a portion of the delays. Through all of this I have come to a number of conclusions.
1. The story needs multiple view points to be effective. The journal works well as a supplement or a PoV for the over all story, I honestly will probably keep the Journal as a side project for the main thing though.
2. I need to flesh out the beginning of the universe. The tales here are absolutely crucial to the end of everything which is a very climactic and massive ordeal.
3. All sides need to be covered. So far everything is one sided and biased which is awesome for a journal but I want more.
4. I think writing the Diary of Jane would be epic.
5. I need to fully develop the story line. The plans for it literally cover thousands of years of history and future. There is too much to keep track of, especially as things evolve, technologies change and the inevitable fusions occur. This is especially true with one of the most pivotal story arcs in the entire series which involves King Arthur and Mordred. I will be clear on one thing with this, I have worked on designing this particular arc since my senior year of high school, I even have a short draft of how the second part begins. The second arc leads into the final climactic chapters of the story and incredibly important when it comes to tying up loose ends.
There is more but over all I think that is enough to say for now.
If you are interested in following this check http://arancum.formmotion.com/forum.htm I will be keeping updates in both places on story line developments and I will keep you all informed on when I begin work on the first chapter.
However, for now I will bid you all a farewell. Wish me luck and keep in contact people! The more I hear for you the more into writing I get!!!
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